DYSFUNCTION RULES IN GRANDMA’S HOUSE

Is everybody happy?

Catching the latest three episodes of the BBC 2 sitcom Grandma’s House made me sorry that I missed the first season.

Simon Amstell. an openly gay struggling actor from a Jewish family, plays the part of  an openly gay struggling actor from a Jewish family.  No prizes for guessing how he and co-writer Dan Swimer came up with the idea.

It’s got all the makings of a boring, safe comedy or a self indulgent mess but works because, like in Mike Leigh’s plays and films,  you cringe in recognition of the characters .

Simon isn’t a great actor but makes manages to work this handicap into the part – “I’m stiff in real life”, he says at one point. He comes over as vulnerable and likeably dysfunctional.

Rebecca Front is particularly good in the role of  his mom Tanya, defending him (“he’s rich in soul”) while wanting him to be more sorted out and assertive. There can’t be many moms who tell their sons they should masturbate rather than meditate.

SPEAKING OUT – HEALING MY LIFE

The disembodied mouth in Samuel Beckett's 'Not I' is a poignant image of isolation.

I am often sceptical of holistic remedies and new age thinking but Louise Hay’s ‘You Can Heal Your Life’ contains a lot of explanations and advice about feelings of dis-ease that more often than not accurate.

She identifies just two mental patterns that poison the body and lead to illness : fear and anger.

I currently have a sore throat and feel that I am on the point of losing my voice.

Louse Hay describes the throat as an “avenue of expression” and a “channel of creativity”.

As a consequence, she states that problems with this part of my body are due to: “the inability to speak up for one’s self. Swallowed anger. Stifled creativity. Refusal to change”.

This diagnosis strikes a chord with me and rings true.

In my family, I am currently feeling that my voice isn’t being heard and am finding it harder to communicate with my 16-year-old daughter who is experiencing a lot of growing pains and psychological challenges resulting from school, boyfriends and other peer pressure.

At work, I am in a situation where I am no longer sure of my role. I am finding it harder to motivate myself and to feel that my work is worthwhile.

In other general situations, when I am with Italians and try to express my opinions; I feel the burden of having to articulate complex ideas or emotions in my second language.

Many of these would be hard enough to say in my mother tongue and the linguistic filter leaves me feeling that I have barely scratched the surface about what it is I really want to say.

Louise L. Hay’s cure is to change my thought pattern and feel that it’s okay to make noise. She advises the following affirmations:

• I express myself freely and joyously.
• I speak up for myself with ease.
• I express my creativity.
• I am willing to change.

The voice of Henry Miller in the opening lines of his novel The Tropic of Cancer also come to mind as I contemplate these thoughts:
“To sing you must first open your mouth. You must have a pair of lungs and a little knowledge of music. It is not necessary to have an accordion or a guitar. The essential thing is to want to sing. This then is a song. I am singing”.

If this post makes you think you should be singing more too – click on ‘like’ button. It would help me feel less alone.

FAMILY SECRETS

Are there any skeletons in your family closet?

Have you ever kept a secret from a loved one to be protective or by being economical with the truth?

These questions arose for me during the course of a weekend visit from my elder brother.

He has recently started researching our family tree; making use of online resources which are cleaner and probably more efficient than trawling through dusty parish register or visiting overgrown cemeteries.

WILD CHILD – MODEL PARENT

LE GAMIN AU VÉLO (The Kid With A Bike) written and directed by Jean-Pierre and Luc Dardenne (Belgium/France, 2011)

Parenting has its rewards but can be also be a thankless task and this movie highlights the physical and psychological demands that go with the territory,

The implicit message of the story is that single fathers are frequently unable to cope with the daily demands of ‘difficult’ children and this leaves women to fill the emotional void left by their absence.

Cyril (Thomas Doret) is 11 years old and a bundle of nervous energy. He’s like a video game character constantly on the move to avoid being shot or captured.

EXTREMELY LOUD, INCREDIBLY CLOSE AND REASONABLY GOOD

EXTREMELY LOUD & INCREDIBLY CLOSE directed by Stephen Daldry (USA, 2011)

Having read a few reviews prior to seeing this movie (always a mistake), I was all set to entitle this post EXTREMELY LAME & INCREDIBLY CONTRIVED. This only goes to show that you should always keep an open mind and shouldn’t take what critics say as gospel.

Steven Daldry’s movie is contrived but it is not lame.

The British director actually makes a pretty decent stab at translating a tricky story on such a sensitive topic to the big screen without laying on the sentiment too thickly. It isn’t perfect but is not the turkey some make it out to be.